Big Dilemma

I have a dilemma that has raised it’s head and won’t seem to resolve itself. I’m a firm believer in everything happening for a reason and sometimes when I have a dilemma it almost sorts itself out by something happening that makes you go in a certain direction.

This one is proving to be a stubborn son of a b**ch!

My youngest whose 12 yrs old now has been acting in some form or another for around maybe 3-4 years. He has been extremely lucky so far and has some great opportunities through it. He has appeared in an Argos advert, a serious play, Shadowlands, where he played an American boy and he won ‘Best Young Player’ in the Kent Festivals for his role. He has appeared in panto with Vanilla Ice and Katy Ashworth, and has worked with the London Film School on a short film, again playing an American boy! He is also under contract until next April with a German company who are creating books for schools to teach English in our schools from 2016 where again he is the main character.

All his jobs have been varied and yet people at each one will comment on how professional he is for his age and how natural he is in front of the camera! As a mum I look for his behaviour on set rather than his acting skills LOL so I don’t tend to see what they do.

Anyway, up until just after Christmas if you had asked him he wanted to be an actor. He has no interest in university and although he is extremely bright he sees school as a social rather than something he needs to put effort into.

Now for the dilemma- he says he is giving it all up!!! He doesn’t want to renew his Spotlight national CV and wants to finish drama after the German contract has ended!!

I’m not sure where this has come from. He has always been happy to trudge up London for last minute castings and auditions, and although he has been knocked back this year on most of them he has hit an awkward age where he no longer qualifies as cute and is not old looking enough for the teenage roles (which I have explained to him).

He desperately needs his portfolio photo updated which was to happen a few weeks ago when he decided to give it all up.

I am sure he would benefit from the updated photo and to continue on Spotlight when it is due to be renewed in September- however, he seems adamant.

Now don’t get me wrong- I AM NOT A PUSHY MUM where this is concerned! We actually have a giggle at those who are when at auditions- honestly you can so tell them from a mile off LOL. But drama and his involvement in acting has always given him a focus and this is where my issue comes in.

Do I just allow him to give it all up and have nothing to focus on? He has already given up Scouts and therefore would have NO outside clubs to attend at all. I personally don’t think this is a great idea. He would need to have an interest in something surely? I do not want him to come from school each day and take himself off to his room and fester there using all his gadgets and not getting out. I think an outside interest is healthy whatever it is, musical instrument/ sports/ clubs etc.

When he was very young at this drama club before they even had an agency they asked him to attend a voice over for Telletubbies as he was a very clear speaker from an early age. He then didn’t want to return and left drama altogether!! A few years later he regretted it and rejoined and did the local jobs as well as joining the national Spotlight site.

So what would you all suggest? I don’t want to force him to do something he doesn’t but I don’t want him to give it up on a whim and regret it again later on. He seems very influenced by his friends at the moment and I am wondering if they have said anything to him that would have made him come to this decision ( he would never admit to that anyway!) .For a 12yr old he has earned quite a tidy sum of money along the way and yesterday went and bought himself an IPAD mini from his earnings, something that I have tried to make him see how lucky he is at this age to be able to get money from an interest!!

Again please let me know what you would do if it were your child? I need all the advice I can get?

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6 thoughts on “Big Dilemma

  1. Amanda

    This is an awkward spot to be in, one my nephew is in as regards to his swimming!

    Is there any possibility he can take a break and return to acting if / when he feels the urge to do so?!
    He’s obviously good at what he does, it would be a shame to stop now, perhaps a little break will remind him why he wanted to take up acting in the first place.

    Has he given any indication as to what he would like to do instead of the acting?

    1. muminmeltdown Post author

      No he doesn’t want to do anything in replacement which is the worrying thing! The problem with taking a break is that the Spotlight CV’s etc are only updated once a year so he could miss out on registering! But maybe you are right a break may work, thanks for taking the time to advise :)

  2. Molly

    It’s such a tricky one isn’t it? I guess you want to encourage and not let him make a mistake he may later regret, but it also needs to be his own decision. Parenthood is a tough one! I remember deciding to give up dance when I was 17. I was heading into tough A’Levels and had got to the point where my dancing friends were choosing it as a career. Deciding I didn’t want to do A’Level dance and didn’t want to pursue it any further was a huge decision and I remember my mum being a bit upset about it. But, ultimately, it was my decision – and turned out to be for the best. I hope you work out the best course of action, sorry I haven’t got more helpful advice!

    1. muminmeltdown Post author

      Actually nice to hear it from someone’s opinion that it actually makes sense to! I think at 12 he makes decisions based on all sorts namely mates, so like you if he were older I would have no problem accepting he didn’t want to do it then. I just don’t want him to miss out just because he maybe feels his mates don’t think it’s cool :) Thanks for popping over x

  3. Sarah MumofThree World

    That’s a tough one, I don’t think I would want him to give up and I would ask him to think very carefully about it. Maybe he gives up and a few months or a year down the line he realises he misses it and wants to go back? It’s a difficult age – my son is nearly 12 too. He’s still going with Scouts, but would like to give up rugby. We’ve told him that’s OK, but does he realise he’ll still have to go to rugby on a Sunday morning and stand in the freezing cold watching his brother?! That made him re-think! Good luck and thanks for linking up with Britmums teen and tween linky.

    1. muminmeltdown Post author

      Thanks for popping over :) We have agreed that he cannot give it up until he finds something he enjoys to replace it……………..he hasn’t rushed himself to find anything and has now gone ahead with his new photos!!! Dealing with a diva 12 yr old or a couple of toddlers?? HHmmmmm…………it’s a toughie :)


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